THE RIGHT THING ( A SHORT STORY )
THE RIGHT THING
- GHOST ORCHID
I I still remember the first time I had to steal. My mom had been bedridden for months. But that night I knew something bad was going to happen. She looked paler than ever. She coughed a lot of blood. I was only a 12-year old boy. I didn’t want to lose my mother. I was worried; I knew that she needed to take her medicines. But we didn’t have enough money to buy them. My so called “father” left us when I was 3. I knew what I was about to do was wrong. I guess I wasn’t thinking straight. I remember going to the medical store and taking medicines and running away. I reached home. It was the middle of December yet the atmosphere felt colder than usual. I didn’t need to check up on my mother; I already knew I was too late. I ran. I don’t know where and how long but I ran until I could run no more.
I got into a gang. My crimes went from robberies to murders. There was no turning back. I was a well-known criminal. People were scared of me. Mothers ushered their children inside their homes when they saw me. I never felt guilty about what I had done. In fact I felt no emotion at all as I mercilessly murdered many. But this night as I committed another one of my crimes, I saw a boy. He reminded me of myself when I was younger not because of how he looked but because of what he was doing. He grabbed a lady’s bag and was running away with it. I felt something I never felt before. No, this wasn’t right I thought. I ran over and caught him. I told him to return the bag and gave him some money. Poor boy, he was crying; I knew he didn’t want to do what he was doing. I could not let this boy ruin his life like I did. Doing this did not reduce the guilt of all the things I did but, at least I could die in peace knowing I had done one right thing in my life.
Good job! I would recommend using a little bit more "show don't tell" if you know what I mean. Otherwise, this is amazing!
ReplyDeleteI thought this was awesome, I could never pull something off like this
ReplyDeleteI'm sure you could if you try ;)
DeleteI agree. It's just the process of wrangling the images inside your mind and forming them into words is what makes writing really hard. And eventually you'll get it!
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